Weird critters in my home

I have moved about 5 houses in my lifetime. At every house, we have some sort of critters living in there which we try not to disturb them or chase them away.

One of the homes had a toad living under the kitchen sink. It only came out during midnight and has grown accustomed to seeing us. We will get a drink from the kitchen and there it was, the toad looking at us like “Rough day eh?”

I had a garden lizard that always appeared on the fence in the afternoons. As you got closer to it, it will start bobbing its head up and down.

Just a few days ago, I found a dead millipede in my toilet and I’m icky about insects so I called someone to clear it for me.

“There’s a millipede in the toilet!”

The response I receive was not something I expected.

Like ever.

Mum: It lives there.

WHAT lives there!? What lives in our toilet!?

Maybe she did not hear me correctly.

Me: I found a millipede on the bathroom floor!

Sister: Oh yea he likes to jog around the toilet in the morning.

Did I hear myself correctly or did I went into another family’s home and used their toilet.

So I went in front of my mum and sister and repeated what I said.

Me: I’m talking about a millipede.

Sister: I know the millipede you are talking about. It usually comes out in the morning for a jog then go back home. It’s harmless.

 

24469333-Cute-centipede-cartoon--Stock-Vector-millipede
An insect that works out more than I do. I’m officially lazier than an insect.

Photo credit: http://www.123rf.com/stock-photo/hundred_legs.html

Me: It’s dead.

Mum: HOW IT DIED!? (Looking at me in shock like a REAL family member had died)

Sis: Oh…that’s too bad. Are you sure?

I’m just going to end it that my mum went to clear the insect. I honestly did not know that we sublet our bathroom floor to an insect training for a marathon in the mornings.

And it died doing that.

So people, death by jogging is real. You people are fooled to think otherwise.

Next story also happened few days ago.

We have a picky rat that kept eating our snacks and instant noodles.

Why picky?

Get this; the rat went into the drawer filled with instant noodles, bit through all the packets EXCEPT for the vegetarian noodles.

So my dad set up 2 rat cage traps in the kitchen.

The first day, it caught something.

It’s a bird.

The second day, it caught something.

It’s the same bird.

You think the same bird would learn to recognize the same danger.

But hell no! Putting food in a metal cage contraption, this means LURRVE.

I like to add that we have a bunch of birds staring into our kitchen daily. They would come in to pick on our food when we are not looking.

I blame it on my dogs.

Instead of chasing them away, they wagged their tails at them.

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